Tales of an Introverted Performer
I want to talk about something that is not ever really spoken about in the theatre world: What it’s like being a professional actor while also being an introvert. Yes, we exist, yes, we are the exception, and yes, you can still love being on stage while not being the most social butterfly.
Does any of this resonate with you? I don’t really see this topic being talked about much at all, and for years, I have struggled with why something that I love so much and have such a passion for can also drain me.
It took me far too long to discover that I am an extroverted introvert. Emphasis on the INTROVERT part. I always want to be invited and welcomed to the party, but whether or not I have the social energy to actually attend said party can only be decided on how I am feeling in that moment.
This has been a bit of a struggle for me as a professional actor. I don’t always feel like hanging out post-show, as performing the show itself uses most of my battery power. Going out is sometimes totally out of the question unless it’s opening/closing night. When I go home after performing a show, I want to decompress. This usually involves some kind of self-care routine like taking a bath, making a yummy and nutritious dinner, listening to music, watching Netflix, cuddling up with a weighted blanket and a candle, etc. This behavior can be mistaken for me disliking my cast-mates or roommates, when that could not be further from the truth. This is simply me trying to take care of myself in the small amount of free time I might have to do so.
I must conserve my energy for when I need it most, which is usually when I’m performing onstage.
In what other profession do you not only work with your co-workers, but also live, eat, run errands, and hangout on your days off with them? It can become a beautiful community, but can also be incredibly draining to the introvert.
What being an introvert in this business can look like:
- Needing alone time (and ample amounts of it)
- Needing a private space to live in and recharge
- Social Battery running low, especially with big personalities to contend with
- Social anxiety that everyone hates me/ being misunderstood/fear of rejection
- Forcing myself to turn “on” in auditions, callbacks, rehearsals, performances
- Being socially drained, and then having to go live with those big personalities, sometimes sharing a room
- Wanting to connect with cast-mates, but also needing time to yourself
- Trying to be involved in the dressing room/side conversations, but not being heard because of being soft-spoken
If this is you, I see you. It is of the upmost importance that you continue to take care of your needs. I urge all naturally extroverted actors to consider how draining performing can be to an introvert and consider their needs outside of the show. We love you, we want to be involved, we want to connect with our castmates, but sometimes our well-being takes precedence. If we are taking care of ourselves, we can better show up as a performer, as a friend, and as a scene partner.
XOXO,
Alyssa
No Sweat Rep Founder